January, 2013 | The Female Grail with Durga Holzhauser
January, 2013


Ask yourself right now:
Whom do I trust?
Do I trust myself?
Do I know things that nobody can prove?

To trust ourselves is an art. We are unsure after so many breakups with our beliefs. To trust oneself is a difficult love affair. Religion, society, politics have broken our hearts. Burned by our beliefs, we are exhausted.
But our knowing has never died.

You know

: the glory of the sun, the moon and the stars.
: the sound of what you hear.
: that you tortured the Bible with your pen when you were six.
  Even then you knew about the untruth.
: that every master has a limited reign.
: that your dream will be fulfilled. You are prepared to wait for it.

Don’t give up on your spiritual life.
It only seems that you are wandering lost
in a forest.
You are already found.

To believe what we know may challenge the contradictions. I promise you, the times you were burned by belief are over. Sisters and brothers who are made of stardust, the pulse of time beats for us now. The world asks now for what is yours. Deliver your beliefs.


Volume oneVolume two

What do you know that nobody can prove?


Read More · January 27, 2013 · · illuminated lifestyle, most popular


(*also for men who are ready to live life to its all.)


I finally found her after searching for the crème on top of feminine leadership. I met her in the wild mountains of Santa Fe. She said: “I am your forgotten Empress. I do not rule this wider world, but I do rule your world.” She completes my Gospel of feminine leadership, continued (If you have missed part 1 or 2, here are the links.)

Dedicated to the forgotten empress

  1. You are a sovereign empress of your kind. You know your empire: it is an impermeable empire of authenticity. You have the power to say no and to invite. You safeguard your boundaries and borders. You powerfully protect your tribe and promote their self-realization. In your empire every soul finds its own place of bliss.
  2. You are a creative new breed. You build empires and show others to do the same. Empires of fresh content and uniquely inspired ideas, desires, glamours, magnetism. Wishcraft reigns. You harness white magic powers.
  3. You are creating a new world. Your vision: A better future our children can be proud of. Creation. Value. Innovation. You show up and shine. You are a revolutionary, life-changing force. You are the dawn of all and you know how to experience, relax and receive. No reproduction, always creation.
  4. You are a wild sister of God. You were born with a prophecy. You awaken. You become aware. You grant presence. You are clear on the purpose of your prophecy: to hold a lifelong, shameless conversation with God.
  5. Your empire’s stars shine bright and inspire others to create a better life. You are your own teacher. You know all the answers; the answers are in you. If not, you know who carries them and can find them. All happenings are part of your teachings.
  6. Embodied bliss: You embrace sensation and sensuality. You nourish the five senses. You are a mother of fiestas and pleasures.
  7. You are the maverick of evolution. Your power is divine, transforming fear and an impulse to control. Whenever you enter a new stage in your life, you simultaneously die and are reborn. Aligning with your own sacred path is salvation. Your life in all aspects is initiation.
  8. You are life: epiphany and incubation, illumination without words.
  9. You are medicine for the world. With humility you know you heal only a small wounded part of life. You grew the medicine in your soul garden and your potions are distilled from experience. Your healing comes at the beginning of each project, not the end.
  10. You are the sovereign ruler of your inside world. Wherever you walk, inside you remain untouched. From this steady space, your outward love commands respect. You embrace all you are, were and will be, and are forever rooted in light guidance. Your vulnerability is your strength. You listen carefully. It’s your secret.
  11. Grounded in your faith, you just know. In that knowing, you are connected to the source and knowing what to do *right now* is your currency. When you doubt your instincts, you know you are not snapped into your pivot point of faith.
  12. You create your own religion. Your life is your initiation path. You make your recipe: Christianity in its purest sugar with some Hindu spices and Buddhist medicine. You are a visionary, shamelessly. You take what an Empress needs. You know the sources of power. You do not reveal all your secrets. You do not deal in conventions.
  13. You plant your ideas and cultivate gardens of unmatched splendor. God is a genius and had no talent at all for repetition. Uniqueness is your authenticity. You are proud of your individuality, as it will show you who you are. When you do what you love it creates an abundant harvest. Success naturally follows.
  14. You create space for growing and thriving. You contribute love-filled spaces to others’ empires, wiping out falsity, destruction, illusion. Others look to you to create the right environment.
  15. Centered. Whispering silence. You oscillate gently in peaceful waves, receiving calm insights into the heart of the matter. Your greatest resource: listing deeply.
  16. You only leave your empire when the balance of earth and universe is in danger, and even then reluctantly. While you’re gone you crave a return to your own environment. When you walk too far away you feel in danger of getting lost, ultimately forgetting your true purpose. To do so would be like a death; you have to return to your spiritual home to be nourished to health by your tribe.
  17. You fearlessly go into the war zones: Inspiration. Artistry. Information activism.
  18. You are generous, knowing that to give yourself is to give a gift of God. Your generosity comes from your greatness. You give away love, light, community, fun, knowledge, motivation, courage, mystic, depth, focus. An Empress gives away acknowledgement, the feeling of being wanted, needed and loved.
  19. Your mission: to develop a concept in the service of enlightenment and good feelings. In this world money tastes like honey and business feels like worship. You turn real dreams into liquid assets. Doing something exceptional & authentically yours plants a small seed for a happy, enlightened society.
  20. You know that the size of your empire is not what’s important. It’s about YOU having the big picture in mind.
  21. You have faith in divine timing. You do things only when you want to do them, when the time is right. You know that the ripest, juiciest movement happens at the right time. So you expand time; you wait.
  22. She who cares less wins. You are relaxed. You find refuge in faith, trust, and confidence.
  23. You come together with the right people. You foster new collective leadership. You invent and innovate your industry together. Connections are the most precious jewels we share. You pray: May the Universe bless our encounter and give us both the grace to grow.
  24. To you competition is irrelevant. Your origin is your inner space, where there is no competition. You grow with and through others in your tribe.
  25. When others doubt you, you know you will change their minds. They will fall in love with you. You create vast blue oceans. You improve life for others. You are wild, you are highly respected. And your divine visions are needed. So be prepared to make opportunities, to fill them with sacred stories and trends that will change the world.
  26. Your leadership style is based on intimate, peaceful conversation. Associating. Creating acquaintance. You heal the conversation that once stopped.
  27. A master of complexity, you pick the right answer at the moment, and the solution is yours. The next moment may be the contradiction, you know this. Wholeness may be discovered in an instant, so you look to the future, not the past. And you find simplicity in every complexity.
  28. You discover new continents everywhere from your bathroom to your desk, the shopping mall, your friend’s eyes, the clothing you slip into each morning, the smile you wear.
  29. You are blessed with such expansiveness that it is no surprise the limitless number of talents and outlets through which you express it. You do not want to tame it. Harness it into a single voice or message. Meet your wildness with your purpose. Help them fall in love and work together. Create a channel in your life like the Grand Canyon to contain their force, and grant access to the sacredness, beauty, and monument of your messages.
  30. You weave your soul’s dress. Honest, truthful, ethical. Live long and remain curious. You maintain your stainless ethical core inside and love the wider world passionately. Bow to birth and death in every single moment.
  31. You acknowledge the sacred in the ordinary. You can see the connecting force between all living things, and ordinary rituals take on great meaning. Simply sharing the ordinary wonder of daily existence, taking time to experience life becomes your second nature.
  32. You find spirituality everywhere and in everything: in a scent, a touch or a sphere, in a color as much as in a journey. You make the spiritual in everyday life visible and tangible. You touch on the rare, suspended moments of bliss in which we know why we are alive and celebrate our own existence.
  33. Your future is moldable. You rest in a cradle of opportunities. An eternal dream activator, you fiercely protect your sacred inception times. You embrace the magic of the moment and the fluid currency of bliss.
  34. You write the script for your life’s movie. You are the actor, not the re-actor. Enjoy the costume, the scenery, the sensory explosion. Give in to seductive enjoyments. Everything you learn you turns into wisdom when you are a conscious participant.
  35. You trust that the universe works for you and you reciprocate with forgiveness. At the end of every single day, you come back to human kindness. You can have it all, but you will never own it. Life’s passion for love dictates the economics.
  36. You are a universal dreamer. Success is a your path of enlightenment. It is the final fulfillment of the dream we were born with. The Universe is abundance. We each carry a pattern inside of what we want to fulfill. You make the ordinary extraordinary.

Om namah shivaya. Endlessly.



We want to flow. We want to be like liquid moving in our daily, hustling life. And we can sense when instead we merely trickle into our work, our projects, our lives. It’s in the painful resistance when writing down a new concept, the tension of pressure that contradicts self-love, the day when everything collapses, the printer goes on strike while you’re trying to deliver on lifelines (ahem, my new word for deadlines) and unhealthy finances that continue to break down the world’s economy.

Let’s talk cosmically. The universe is a pattern of life-organized dynamics, a prevailing and self-organized flow. It’s intrinsic blossoming. The rhythm lives within. Every other person owes her/his rhythm, their every idea, every project, every motion to it. Everything has roots in a universal flow. Everything.

New think-in demands new habits.
Life has learned to learn and adapt with the flow. So must we.

Float on.

The universal flow is mysteriously formed. It came Before. The silence of the blank, waiting alone and without expectation. Ever so present. The mother of all creations. Let’s call it life.

Knowing her greatness she flows. Far. Always coming home. The Mother of all Mothers returned.

The greatness is her secret of sharing. We go after fulfillment on Earth. Earth strives for the fulfillment of Heaven. Heaven strives for the fulfillment of life. Life goes for what is natural.

Ideas flow openly.
Embody the rhythm.

The outflow of God is his will manifested in our expressed qualities.

New think-in about tension
(because ideas come from God):

The law of generosity says: tension is part of the natural flow of creation. When liquid assets from Heaven flow into us, they rub against our body and blood. This friction cocktail is needed to inspire communication with our bodies. First it flows through our bloodline and veins and awakens us. Before we go into motion, we first have to embody the prophesy. Flow is manifestation, naturally.

Ideas + blood flow = circulated greatness.

New think-in about pain (because fire comes from God):

The law of vastness says: pain is a vision from God of lost horizons. Ideas are fire. Daydreams are creative flow, causing us to embark upon the endless sky. We burn until we set our pain free to return to the source.

So pain is life’s recovery under fire. Pain is the movement of our soul against stingy timidity, bigotry, narrow-mindedness. We roast till we are free to flow with the divine.

fire + vision = awakened greatness.

New think-in about leadership
(because guidance comes from God):

The law of bliss says: all rivers end in the ocean. The river implicitly knows his destination. I learn the freedom of leadership from the river. I understand mutual leadership in leading and being lead. In one way the river need not think about his destination. The ocean cares for it (i.e., the Law of Attraction). The river cares only for the current, its currency.

Freedom is knowing when to give up to a higher source and when to lead. The nature of pain is freedom and liberation, the sweet pain of the mercy of surrender, the bondage of devotion, the dependence of happiness, being injured by love, abused by grace.

receive + share = enlightened leadership.

“We are seeds of the endless devotional flow buried into Earth to grow and awaken as lovers without boundaries.” – Agni

Now let’s flow.


The liquid teacher

Put your hands on your heart, palms facing inwards and feel the rhythm of your heart. Feel the rhythm of the parts where you want more flow. Feel the existing flow there. Do not measure or change it. It may feel fluid or stuck. That is your status quo.

Check in with:

Your private life.
Your biz life.
Your body life.
The life of your current project.

Now have a look on the list below and find the medicine words that will unplug the flow.
Then add one or more of the words to each bullet below. Trust your first choice.

Listen to the story it wants to tell you. Honor the words’ advice.

Your private life: __________________
Your biz life: __________________
You body life: __________________
The life of your current project: __________________

The list of medicine words*:

*(This is my personal check-in list when I ask a dammed flow to release. The word itself teaches me what will heal the flow.)

dive in
flow, awakened
move when necessary
concentrate: build essence
invest in reflecting the detail
settle down: ideas, yourself
fill up: powerful
slow down
stand still
give up; entrust leadership to another source
wait: open to patience
burst forward
let go
clear up
collect: contact the collective
flexible: adjust
change rhythm or dynamics
contemplate, reflect
breathe, just breathe
give up
start anew

you can add your own healing words too…

For a moment go back to the original pain. Release it.

1. Feel into the new word.
2. Let it flow: Escape into an open horizon of freedom.
3. Feel the escaping emotion. This is the sensation of your pain set free.
4. Dive into the open horizon of possibility. Its rivers run like the promise of an endless blue sky.



Collaborate with
the spiritual world.
Quit overwhelm.

My daily lessons in Miracles.

“You do not trust us. But you push and control.
You are disconnected and so unproductive.”

My spirit guides were right. For days I had forced myself into deadlines for my Future Book program. My worst day was now my own personal Black Thursday. It was a hustle until the shock of freezing, hitting the dead end for creative fire and joy.

“So what? I have deadlines and the download of creativity is flooding me. Each time it gets more powerful and plentiful than I imagined.”

Aha. I know this pattern too well. I am tired of myself. I want to know how to change my anti-flow, the energy moving against the universal currency of the creation.

“We know your deadline. Who do you think creates and backs you up all the time?”

“You are working on my products, from the higher source?”

“All the time. We inspire the original genius behind all creations.”

“Oops. You mean business. So what is my part?”

“Create art. Perform beauty. Turn both into manifestation.”


“Your task is pleasure. Just take care of every detail. Search for God in there. OM-Joy.”


“Flow with the creation. Wait till ideas are ripe and then pick them.”

Silence. Honestly I was shaken and felt really stupid after all these years of spirit journey. How had I gotten trapped in my old pattern without any consciousness of what was happening? Each time my ambitious business goals come along I block out all my spiritual know-how. Fucking damn bold of me.

A breath. My Universal Sadhana reminder:

Standing stunned by vastness, moved by the immense majesty of the universal beauty. The ongoing activity, exploding creativity that permits even stars into existence.
Out of the stars everything comes forth: dynamic entities, they are born and even they die.
The circle of gravitational power, collapsing and creative, explosions natural and eternal. Atomic power shines and collapses inwards to become a black hole.
Deliver. The active pattern of creation itself is intrinsic. Life blossoms forward naturally. Inevitably. (Free from the Story of the Universe.)

Quitting overwhelm

I swallowed my Super-Detox-Anti-Anxiety-Stress-Relief Remedy.
In the days after listening deeply within, I flew with my intuition. I went back into synchronicity state.
I found Right timing for 2013.
I walked in my own writings (HOW TO HAVE FAITH IN SYNCHRONICITY TIMING).
Grace and miracles aligned and I finished all my work with time to spare.
So when creative flow is emerging, why stand in the way?

There is a big misunderstanding about living our divinity in this body.
And about what God really is.
I had to figure out answers for myself.
I had to make my own journey.

For your business goals: Flow.

We need schedules and plans in times of chaos. The beauty lies in rebirth. We create the new.

“Lay your dream at your feet.” – Agni

Make a list of all the things you need to do, then put it down in front of our Temple (or altar) and give it up to The Higher Source. Pray for it to be handled and cared for. Then take the most important things and fill them with joy and love, and forget the rest. Then flow onward and forward…continue this way. God shines in details.

…and if something decides not to be ready on deadline (what a strange expression!!!!), who cares?

I have practiced it even with my clients: “I’m sorry this is the state I arrived. The rest is in process, and you know what, nothing ever was not ready in ‘the right time.’”

May I introduce you to my personal spiritual team?

BABAJI: known from the AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF A YOGI. He is the incarnation of Shiva, without boundaries. Last time he lived till 1984 in the Himalayas.
He is a killer of mind ideas and focuses on heart desires. He says karma yoga work is the solution of our age. Let’s rock it.

SAI BABA: He lived in South India and went into Samadhi in 2011. He appeared to me in my room when I was 25 and since then I have seen healings and miracles.
I dive into his aura when I want to be golden. He makes you feels abundant when working.

JESUS: Memoired personally by me in JESUS THE BOOK.
He is Christlove and bliss of fire. He has the best modern ideas, guaranteed.

Each one is a real Avatar, a creator.
This is the difference between them and other guides. These are God realized.
If you want their consulting, a real desire calling is sufficient. When you reach out to their heart, they will contact you.

So now ask yourself: Who are your spiritual guides?
Contact them and see: they really like entrepreneurial business ideas.
Tell them what you are up to. Their answers will come from all directions and the inner voice.

2013. This year start the trend and prove the genius of this collaboration.