Surrender. Die. And embrace the unknown.

Universe/God has left me with big question mark on my forehead. For two weeks now I’ve had more questions than answers. Usually my insistent WHYs to Universe/God provoke a chain of illuminating events and insights that grant me an understanding of wholeness and shifting answers.

A missing Business plan for the feminine.

This time it is different. Let me tell you the background story. On the 6th of December we started our book launch for Jesus the Forgotten Years, the sequel to JESUS the BOOK. We were a team of 4 women rocking WordPress backstage: virtual assistants running on high octane, others studying the latest internet launch strategy games on the market, and me running design strategy. (You must know I used to be an art director in my past life.) We were a fast-paced train of action.

: Everything in your life is something that you want!
Now a word about timing: our book launch wanted to take place during a time when energies are climbing up to winter solstice; when the longest night opens deep initiations for our souls’ lives. Something inside me knew that this book wanted to be born in the dark, like a shining star arises from the sacredness of black holes. You can see how that might change the game…

In the middle of gearing up for a busy deadline, all indicators were a go for getting it done with fire. Suddenly, even with our devotion level increasing and high speed momentum building for even more manifestation in short time, my voice (I call him God/in Me) interrupted and clearly said:

Stop the train!
Get out and listen to the grass grow and swallow light blue air of the sky’s endless expansion.
Nothing will happen if the train does not arrive on time at its destination.
Receive instead of doing.
Truthful presence will open greater miracles
and expand time.

Honestly! No Google research will help you with this inquiry.


When I started The Female Grail I promised to launch a women’s research team about the lost knowledge of the sacred feminine and enlightened business. Today’s marketing is very masculine, its action-taking principles reflect ever-expanding energy. The Feminine energy, on the other hand, is embodied by receptive stillness.

We are marvels in mastering masculine business. But wholeness has both within. It is obvious what the world now requires en masse to re-balance with the universal.

I stopped the train and called my strategic virtual assistant Kat.

“Kat,” I said, “we have to change the strategy. This does not flow with these books.”

“I know,” she responded.

This moment marked the mutual realization of each other’s wisdom, and the beginning of intuition-based marketing rooted in deeper-place knowing, dotted with nebulous inklings.

Winter solstice

Nature is wise on this earth. In autumn the leaves start to drop and the plants withdraw their power and concentrate their external power completely on the innermost. When nature is naked, warmth cannot be found outside ourselves anymore, just like the light cannot be found outside ourselves anymore.
 The energies focus on essential forces, indigenous in our bodies. The empire of the plants enshrined this wisdom. The power of the light flows now only inside, in the prayers, in holy mantras, proclaiming the oneness of creator and us. The powers rests and does not want to be a searched expression anymore until she pulses with the heartbeat of the creator again. (Excerpt: Simon speaks about Holy Cycles from Jesus the Forgotten Years)

I opened the chamber of prayers, trust and synchronicity

When we stop the train and inquire about our authentic self, we start to realize that our idols and role models are limited. They guide us to a gate till we are ready to listen carefully to this inner voice of our own and only path. She will guide us and let us into our lost knowing in the sacred land of intuition.

Wandering in this land, I called my copywriter Pema. She had been my midwife in giving birth to my lost voice. “Thank you for all your interviews and guidance that healed me. You are surrounded by a sacred space that makes the soul speak.”

I knew that the right questions are the beginning of defragmenting wholeness when Pema asked, “Can one teach intuition?”

This moment hit right in the middle of the black hole. Breathing.

Meet the fierce goddess Kali. She will swallow your illusions. Dance with her and she will kill your refusal to rise. Let her come close to cut through all bondage that captured your heart when you refused to cry aloud.

On the day of the launch.

My friend Nohila asked me, “Are you excited?”
“No,” I responded. “I am dying once again, my skin layers peel.”

Make fire and lose yourself dancing in the flames.

An exceptional book must make an exceptional journey.
I started an inner pilgrimage into the land of intuition.

Agni, my spouse, is convinced they will find us.
And my virtual self-care assistant Jess was comforted when I told her that I would instead search for promotion strategy that feels like my own.

Give up all worlds to which you do not belong.
Increase presence. Allow dreams.
Be magnetic.
Be joy. Be love.

I am still a wanderer in the land of intuition, I dare to try and make mistakes, but I promised myself to stay close to myself and my truth.

What about you?



Debbie Martin says:

Thank you. This is a beautiful and brave reminder to me that I must first seek my “beingness” before my “doing” and “having.” It is so easy to get the cart before the horse and push to have, have, have. A reminder that the journey is about listening and having the courage to change course, if that is the inner urge. Wow! I just had a thought! Perhaps the best marketing strategy is “surprise!” Like the feminine allure of mystery. The illogical path. Hmmm Interesting

Irka Schmuck says:

Thank you Durga! That’s exactly what the world needs now. That’s exactly what I need now. I love it to return to intuition, to feel my own truth and to stay close to it, close to myself… Always love, Irka

Ambika says:

Thanks Durga, wintersolstice brings about a wider range to bring my business into: rooms are opening up, not only inside, but outside and new business is on the way to be launched. In all this happy process I just follow the flow. It becomes immediateley painful if me sor somebody else involved wants to “KNOW” something in advance. What can you say about an innocent child you just received in the womb? Is nature thinking about how many apples will hang on its branches NEXT spring, when this autumn was a heavy load to carry and a happy relief to just let it go? No,….nature rejoices in the moment and KNOWS there will be apples, no matter what…but while nature KNOWS, poeple go around and ask questions about the future because they lost the ability to go pregnant and trust in the natural outcoem. We have to focus on the present moment, on what is there NOW, and do it with all our love, all our PRESENCE, being here and fill the spaces…yes. Same time we will have to deal with all the OLD structures…I pray that we will be standing strong in creating this new female business world. Free from competition and fear. – we have a way ahead. Lets stand strong together and thanks o the Lord for our protected “KItchen” places where we have the time to cook the meal….Love

Lone Morch says:

Durga, I have been in this inquiry for the past two years – when I realized that I was not one to do a lot of hype, talk things up that didn’t exist yet or worse, try to be louder than the loudest to get attention to my work and words. I’ve just published my memoir Seeing Red (which in a way is about that journey !) and while I’m in deep admiration for those who can do the big launch and, I have had to become okay with the fact, I just don’t function that way. So I’m right with you. In fact I would love to have a conversation with you, about this, maybe a conversation we can share with the rest of the world? You’ll see more about my quest on my site, and you can find me here: moc.hcromenolnull@enol Thank you for sharing this. So so important for our generation of women who constantly are bombarded with the bigger, better, bolder lingo. Organic, circular, trusting, slowing down, feels better. So much love, xo