fiercely feminine | The Female Grail with Durga Holzhauser - Part 2
Category: fiercely feminine

The Manifesto of Trust


Trust creates space for others to walk in.
Then invest in their best, and give out bonuses.
Do it with your eyes wide open.

My first real boyfriend cheated on me. He went on tour with a school musical for two months and we did not see each other the whole time. I did not cheat. I was faithful.

I decided to trust anyway.
I would trust men in the future. As an investment. With risk.

It took me awhile to accept that my confident expectation of commitment was not met. But in the end it’s my loyalty to myself that makes the day run smoothly.

My father cheated on my Mum. He went so far as to introduce me to his new conquests, manipulating my trust. The women pretended to be my cool girlfriends as a ploy to turn me into their ally. It was only my instinct telling me: Something is wrong here. Does Mum know?

I did not want to be his accomplice, or theirs. I felt betrayed. We all deserve to be told the truth about situations others put us in, so that we may accept or reject the situation from our essence. Fabricated emotional settings blur our essence’s ability to discern safe ways to interact and connect. Swallow. I went on.

I decided to trust anyway.
I would trust women in the future. As an investment. With openness.

The ability to be vulnerable and open with fearless abundance saves me from drama. Stay with me on this one. People will play games and take part in their own dramas. Others do wrong things and they may hurt us.

But I will not shut down my heart, and I trust my instincts as I trust my future to carry me. I trust my openness to ask for the outrageous truth.

I started a new business with a French girlfriend. She cheated on me and ran off with 30,000 euros of my money. To make matters worse, the money I gave her was intended to pay our supplier. It was never paid, and left me looking shady too.

I decided to trust anyway.
I would trust the people I worked with in the future. As an investment. With healing.

We have met others millions of times in this and other lives. We ourselves have made good and bad memories for others. I want to pay my karma and move on.

There is no guarantee my business partners will be loyal. Even so, I want to be noble, and the most noble parts of me trust again and again, though it is sometimes a struggle.

It was the two of us, two women. We shared a common dream: to built an ashram, to lead others without compromise in freestyle spiritual life and mysticism. But she met a man and got pregnant. I love children and so I took this baby from heaven as part of my team. Then she got pregnant again and had no time for our dream.

I decided to trust anyway.
I would trust the women in my life. As an investment. Without any guarantees.

I still keep our dreams wide open for the healing of all women. We both had to admit that reality brought us back to the ground. We both agreed that we hadn’t found any solution to women’s challenge of balancing work and children. We both agreed that we know about our purpose, and either we can go for it or drop it.

I decide to trust anyway, after every heartbreak and rotten story. We all carry a memoir in miniature like a garment woven through with past dramas and disappointment. We all have these encoded stories of the delusions in our lives.

My soul craves clear space.
Doubt and suspicion are poisonous.
I do better to invest in trust and risk disappointment,
because I can recover from denial and letdown.
But I won’t ever love with a dark cloud of mistrust hanging over my head.
I would never recover if that poison filtered my heart.

Look, resilience doesn’t come from having guarantees.
Life comes with verifiable ugliness and multi-dimensional beauty.

I trust life.
Always with a free breath because of the millions of endorphins found in loyalty, nobility and breathtaking love.

Trust now. Trust in life. Not everything will be positively, life-affirmingly true.

Deciding to trust anyway is an investment that will become a bridge to possibility and sacred spaces that make us feel golden and good.

Create sacred space. Your investment. No pay backs.



The cosmos finds its expression in their form.
These temples embody the power of creation.
They are temples of all possibility.

The Shakti temples in India are built in circles, concentrically spinning Shakti power.
They are dedicated to 81 to 64 Yoginis, feminine embodied powers, who await us on an adventure.

I tapped into the existence of the Shakti temples in India some months ago. Though new to me in this lifetime, they simply would not let me go. They followed me in my dreams. Later as I was writing Jesus The Seeds of Christlove, I finally remembered: I was there before, with Jesus 2,000 years ago.

Now it’s time for me to return. It’s time for a new conversation.

On December 9th I will board a plane to India and travel to the Shakti temples. Join me, and I will take you on my travels. Together we dive into the lost power of the feminine enlightenment.

Click here to subscribe and travel with me

In just one week’s time, I will enter the field of Shakti in India with my Yogini sherpas Seema Kohli and Stella Dupuis. Equipped with my iPad, my Moleskine art book, water colors and pens, I will explore ancient rites and initiations, and decode old sacred symbols.

I leave without expectations
of what I will find, but with faith that the spirituality made by women, the goddess power, is spinning for us. It opens the veils of mystery that lie over the Yoginis and Durga. (HOW TO TAP INTO YOUR KNOWING)

My spiritual name, Durga, hunted after me following my first trips to India. I went to see Shastiriji, who had a magic bracelet given to him by Babaji. He called me Rada (considered an incarnation of Durga). Once I dreamed of being with Sai Baba and I turned into a golden goddess with ten arms. In that dream, he called me Durga. Later I asked Agni, one of my teachers, to tell me my spiritual name.

“It’s Durga,” he said. “She who goes up to the clouds and brings wonderful presents down to earth.”

So, here I am. And here’s what I am offering:

I will share my travels with you. We will spin and dance in the Tantric power. I will make movies on my iPad as I go. The videos will be in your inbox and posted to our own online Shakti temple as soon as they are created and we have internet access.

I will travel to far beyond places while I am there. The truth is that I do not know what I will discover, but I am ready for what may come. I have burnt for the spiritual feminine many times, and do not fear death or anything else.

You are part of my journey.
The stars are aligned.
The times are fortunate. (See below!)

Click here to subscribe and travel with me

  • The Opening of the Tantric Bridge
    Open or Close

    The Opening of the Tantric Bridge …
    by Dr. Beatrix Czeizel and Anikó Greskó

    We would like to let you know that during the next few days, one of the relevant and complex stellar constellations of the year of the Stellar Nation of the Female Serpents, namely the Serpent-bearer (Ophiuchus) and the Serpent (Serpens) constellations and their mysteries will turn into messages as their stars come into alignment with our Sun one by one.

    This heavenly star-dance begins with the conjunction of the Yed Prior and the Sun between 23-27 November, followed by the Marfik-Sun alignment between 26 and 30 November, joined by Han (30 November – 4 December), then Sabik (9-13 December) and at last Cebalrai (15-19 December).

    According to the message of the Heavenly Goddess, the art of pleasure is related to this star. The opening of the gate of pleasure, the knowledge of the secrets of the tantric mysteries with the art of touching.

    The whole tantric mystery is about joining and uniting the mystical Two, all the polar and dual antidotes, so that finally they should all become One again. One – with each other, through each other and one with the being of the Source of Creation. The female serpent remembers its male partner too, stretching over the cosmic sky, and it longs to reach the gate of enlightenment and redemption by uniting these two qualities. This is a very important wisdom of the female serpent and the Goddess, in which the body-and-soul born from a completely intimate experience – in the ecstasy of pleasure –, and the separate particles are united again, they dissolve in one another and in the absoluteness through the gate of the heart.

    Another related knowledge that belongs here is that the pleasure is nothing else but the joy of remembering the Light. And what happens when reaching the tantric ecstasy is that the couple uniting in the experience bathes all their cells, hearts and souls in the joy of remembering the Light, and by that they reach the Realm of the Light. …

    Thus the sacral knowledge that is connected to this mystery can awaken within the next period in those who were once initiates, but also the memories of the related wounds and oppressions can come to the surface, because the moment of healing has just arrives in this special year.

    Therefore it is useful to take this opportunity and consciously ask for the healing to happen in everyone who is related to the messages of this stellar world and their sacral rituals. (You can read the detailed teaching about this in our book Stellar Nations – Soul Families, Volume I, pages 425-430)

    Click here to subscribe and travel with me


Read More · December 4, 2014 · · fiercely feminine, most popular, offerings


The feminine leader initiated

#Soulgathering is a new concept designed to bring us together in open fields of inspiration to co-create the future. Each #Soulgathering has a topic and destination. This time we played around with new feminine leadership and cruised our souls into creativity and spicy conversations.

“Leadership is neither female nor male. It is the ability and capacity to lead your team or tribe to the vortex of their lives where they experience their own inner leadership and align heaven and earth.”

Shakti inspiration

Shakti is the soul; Shakti is life.
Each day was dedicated to an aspect of Shakti, the divine feminine. Oils handmade by Durga opened channels in our bodies. The field of the goddess Shakti opened to guide us for one whole day in our experience and inner teachings.

Ritual for Durga: Invite the feeling of irresistible empowerment into your life

Ritual for Kali: Invite the rich freedom of patterns into your life

Ritual for Lakshmi: Invite the rich feeling of abundance into your life

Creative inspiration

Art for our inner landscapes. Womanhood intentions. We weave, we sew, we knit, we color our future.

Food inspiration

Women dive into landscapes of their leadership and chill out in creative storms. Meanwhile our star chef Michael Spiridon was the emperor of the kitchen and pampered us with healthy, nourishing, divine food.

Beauty inspiration

Inside and outside, 100% organic: pampering cosmetics and powerful anti-aging vibrations.

#soultalk inspiration

Fierceness, leadership, one’s path, visions, craziness, silence, the creative force and our part in all of it.

erin-gilesErin Giles
“You will be known for your compassion for this world.”

ann-mollerAnn Moller
Magic happened. She made the creative process real.

“Silence is where real leadership begins…”

#naturespa inspiration

The enchanted land. The healing of our souls.

Dining under the stars inspiration


#holygrailvortex inspiration

We experience wholeness and love.

Thank you to all the souls who made this possible.
We have planted a seed.
We will grow an empire.



I believe
We are all born with a vision bigger than us.
Each sub-goal is a step on the pathway to your own personal heaven.

I also believe
That we are much happier living according to our soulgoals.
Because then we have the whole universe and all of our spiritual helpers on our side.

Your soulgoal
Is what you have dreamt in heaven for this life.
It vibrates at a certain frequency.

If you want to live your vision you must shift the frequency of your life
To the level of your souldream.

In a lower vibrating field or environment your vision cannot be realized.

There is a creation energy level needed to manifest your desires.
We are the only ones who can ensure that it runs at that energy level.

The new spirituality is the tool to do that, and embody your prophecy.

Let us start simply.
Find out if you vibrate on the level where the synchronicity of the universe can work for you.

Awareness is the beginning of change.

Imagine a scale from 0 to 12.
Your soulgoal vibrates at 12, the number of wholeness.


Check your inner landscape.
At what frequency is your state of mind and emotion vibrating?
Write down a number on a scale from 0 to 12.
Do not think; let your body answer for you.
(The remedy for growth here is a transformation coach or a spiritual consultant.)

Does your environment vibrate with your soulgoal?
At what frequency are the places you live and work vibrating?
Write down a number on a scale from 0 to 12.
Do not think; let your body answer for you.
(The remedy for growth here is a Feng Shui to match the frequency of your environment.)

Are the people that surround you vibrating with your soulgoal?
Go deep darling, this is live shifting.

Ask yourself.
How much do I have to shift my energy level in order to live my soulvision?

From (number) to (number).

To successfully work with all forces of Shakti (the creative power of the Universe), beam yourself up to that frequency.

When you start to feel the frequency of your soulgoal, the spiritual response will follow. twitter

Consciousness grows under awareness.
Cultivate it.
Have fun.
This is all about love and joy.



A new feminine approach
to learning.

Do you have an inkling for a new idea?
Is there a new concept sparkling in your aura that will reinvent your industry?
Do you receive fragments of a cosmic light pattern; are you going to start something new and revolutionary?

In order to succeed you have to look at your work from your unique perspectives. You must think about it in your own creative way. Do not accept what is already out there. Your perspective might be the only one from which you can see new art, history, music, business ideas, books, visions of new life.

Ignore old learning. Start thinking fiercely alive.
Intention. Choose aliveness.

Do this with the aim of creating a new theory. There is a trend in every human domain that will affect human life for the better. About God, sexuality, livelihood, the future of humanity and good living. Everything.

Learn and think.
Creative thinking.

“I got to thinking about the other story that has been told to me. I have to choose to listen to that other voice urging me to listen to my inner wisdom over my historical betrayer.”

The exercise

Don’t learn anything for 24 hours.
Choose a theme of your passion.

Unplug. Disconnect from the noise of the digital world.
Hear yourself love.
Choose nature. She is the connection to reality.
Tap into the wisdom of not knowing.
Forget what you have learned and what you have been told.

Go into a field of consciousness about your passion.
Address the field of synchronicity. Let the fields work for you.

Instead of thinking, be that field.
Follow your instincts like a wolf.
Be inspired by what meets you in this field. Pay attention to signals from people, places, words and images.

Let your mind go with your heart.

Dive into the meaning of life.
Choose slowing down. You are worth it. Every time.

Look, we have layers of understanding.
Open your heart into a larger soft expansion of sensuality.
Think about that field. Create something out of it.

Receive + Collect + Integrate + Imagine

Trust that the field sends you the signals.
(Do not analyze too soon; let the openness of the field orient you.)

Gather information. Trust that you are getting exactly the information you need.
(Opinion and judgments are too restrictive in this area of creation.)

Magnetize the good. Your body wants to recycle knowledge. Your energy will dissolve it and solve it.
(Deflect the negative. Identify with: Look, this exists.)

We need to be the truth of our authentic self. The higher self is king and queen.
(Awareness changes when we embrace our memories. No time to ponder, wait or imitate.)

We cannot wait to see what you express.
We want it. Always, it’s worth it.

The un:hearable un:seeable things. Tiny micro-cosmoses vibrating soft magic. Just one small, connected liaison with your mystic soul each week can open, affect, and attract positive interruptions for the new creation. You can do it. You must. To connect with your soul, to feel your own cosmic rhythm of calling. To feel your thoughts. To let aliveness find you real connections. Love holds it all together. For every one of us.

The muscle of our feminine learning needs a regular workout.
You must exercise it. You must experiment with it.

(I am telling you this from my pilgrimage to the 3rd volume of JESUS THE BOOK & THE SERIES. Landscapes, people and memories cross dragonlines in unexpected ways never before imagined.)



3 laws of cosmic generosity.

: Why duplicators can never touch you.

You invented it. You built it with all your ambition and love. You imagined it till the baby was born and you proudly revealed her to the world. You created the most beautiful website, a brand new product. Boom.

Shortly thereafter, the imitators came online and stole from you. Today’s web-brain is even more wide open to idea hackers. It is impossible to protect our spiritual goodies.

It happened to me and maybe to you. The most creative trendsetters are always hunted.

Luminaires will be copied millions of times by the nobodies. twitter

But why don’t self-made icons like Marie Forleo and Danielle LaPorte care about this?

: Nobody can steal your light.

From a spiritual perspective, see it like this:

When you are howling into your cushions because somebody stole your idea and design, you have not yet arrived at the place where you radiate your light.

The sovereignty of your presence has not yet dipped into your hot truth, your inimitable voice and the full expression of your irresistible identity.

Better to shower these copycats with gratitude for pointing you out.
You have found your sparring partner until you shine your fullest.

As long as you can be confused with others, your unique soul expression is not grounded.

: The unique copy of you is divine. twitter

The Art of War
for creative entrepreneurs

: Steady, now. The one who avoids, confronts or flees will lose.
They can try to steal your light, but this is impossible. Decide to stay put. Keep going toward what you believe in. Make it even greater. Then surrender and radiate. The only way is to cultivate and expand our own light and be self-assured.

: Be ahead of everybody. Be smarter.
You will do it again. You are a creator, after all. Even when you are copied a trillion times, you will create anew. While copycats are still duplicating you are creating the next trend. Stay with the maverick and trend line and you will be at the forefront every time. Copyright thieves will always fail in the long run, because true creatives consistently reinvent.

: Build relationships on loyalty and trust.
The only way to knock out copycats is through wholeness. Unreal people build on illusions. Cover your path with gratitude and generosity. Time will pay you back for your kindnesses, so don’t be afraid of generous gestures. You are investing in priceless relationships and collective experiences. Nobody can copy what you have lived through with someone.

When you radiate, people will be magnetically attracted to you. Expect it.
We want that light or least the clearest glimpse of it.

The moment they start to copy you, breathe in and enjoy that rich feeling.
You are not “nobody” anymore.
You are now at the beginning of your iconic star system. There, you shine.




(Walking the initiation path in shopping malls and ashrams, with champagne and feminism.)

My letter to this world.

… remember
your life began within a woman. We all were nestled in the womb. Life is always within a Mother. But women are more than mothers: wives, companions, sisters, friends, bitches, witches, princesses, fairies, mothers of culture and wonderful girls, creative fire priestesses, artists, girl warriors, marvels, igniters, women on fire, crones, goddesses and angels (feel encouraged to add your fantasy here, and dare to live it). Each woman is one of a kind!

Dear you, visions of a worldwide revolution make me write and teach. I craft with my fingers and hopes, faithfully offering a space for the future I want to belong to; meanwhile bees make a rural exodus and masses of people protest denial.

My prayer is clear. I raise a fierce feminine voice in a world that is ignorant of creation, in which we witness ruthless exploitation of nature, religious wars and politics without ethics. I want to start a new conversation of leadership. I will contribute my sacred voice; it lives inborn and is each woman’s birthright.

I do not want to change the world, but I must admit I like the end of the road. To find a way out of the crises we must nurture new ideas and make new moves.

Women today have a mission.
So do men, but our world lives in an old pattern of male domination. The feminine has been forgotten and role models of feminine leadership are now needed to take their seats in writing a new history of humanity together with men. Women have strong values and we need to use them to balance the end of the road of unnatural economics, politics and society.

The gospel of feminine leadership

Visions for the future.
10 years ago I spoke at big women’s conferences about my future vision, the rebirth of entrepreneurial women breaking the glass ceiling. Creating new space kills the status quo; the one who fights against the establishment is a single representative of the vast other side.

And today all over the world women create their own businesses; even secretaries have reinvented themselves as virtual assistants. The trend: Be your own boss, and create success on your own terms. Even more: Soulgoals for what we want most.

When I travel the word I know, women have different conditions in different countries, but whatever the circumstances are, women rise for freedom.

The feminine awakens and with her an energy-shifting change takes place that will shift our horizons in every part of life. “Beauty is the mother of all. For the sisterhood of God’s wild sisters.”

Add the sacred feminine

The female sources rise to cooperate with the masculine.
The feminine knows how to create with invincible power.
Transformation is past. Today we expand with evolution.

The goddess always has a niche to resurrect.

You are the world revolution.

Knitwork with the stream of creation.
Criss-cross the unbelievable.

Holy stream of light bumping your heartbeat
loudly to awaken universes.
You are the animating,
feeding power of life, the supreme light
in every being in every thing in every human.

We call you universe,
we call you Shakti,
we call you GreatMother.

The temple is your expression of completed contemplation.
Your sacred pattern weaves.

In your stream I have my place, my name.
You are unchangeable. Mandala.

Let me touch your texture with my fingertips.
Changeable quintessential.
Each moment was just born.

My mission is to bestow upon myself fulfillment.

I set my right intentions.
There will be stumbling blocks on my way.
Keep me alert.

Pave my way.



She fell in love with her crisis.
Her dreams from days confirmed. She is here for the greater good.
To leave this earth without mattering is not part of the agreement.
Traveling across her soul and the world.
She silently collects her shattered holiness.
A few pieces are left to return home.

Getting ready

For a higher purpose. A promise made.
The nature-force in the lead.
She now understands her rebellion was against an inner enemy.
She is a now-human, holding cosmopolitan pom-poms. She united the forgotten.
She dictates her world according her sacred rhythm.

Feminine Divine.

Beauty, a free sacred RED, a charming courier of hope, a naturalizer, a modern shaman, a cosmic nomad. She sits in the front row, her stage, her strength, her sweet seduction, her sacred voice, fierce, her Holy Grail.

SHE is a gypsy of the world tribe; she is a self-invented mystic. She is here and fierce and irresistible, she loves the deep purple of veins of the Universe, she inspires new generations, she is a leader who has come to inspire the future and change this world. She was born with a prophecy.

Till now she thought to herself, “who the hell do you think you are?”
But now she is on; the crisis is her call.

She knows: she is the cosmic nomad.
Everywhere is home. And nowhere.

She reaches out her tender hands to offer the sacred masculine.

She is you.



One of my core desired feelings is: Incredibly powerful.

Maybe it’s not very feminine. Not in the common sense. But we aren’t we here to push that old paradigm off the throne and raise up a juicier one?

“Hello my name is Durga. I am incredibly powerful.”

I want to meet you there.

Say it out loud.

Put in your name:

Hello my name is ___________. I am incredibly powerful.

Stay there. Do not step aside.

Years ago:
A male client stalked me. I had never given him any reason to believe he had a right to anything beyond the charm and love I try to grant all people I meet, but he was obsessed. He even followed me over the borders of Germany to France. I was home alone and not expecting anyone when the doorbell to my house rang. Wondering who it was I saw his profile in my surveillance video. I had told him 2 years before that he had nothing to expect, and I hadn’t seen him since.

But there I was, alone in my house in the countryside. I called my friend, and she was shopping 30 minutes away. I put myself in front of the mirror: “You can wait for Natalie, but you will stay a victim inside.”

Rise Durga within. Kick disempowering invadors out of your sacred territories.

I tore the door open: “You are not supposed to be here. I did not invite you. Please leave my land.” My arm outstretched and my finger pointed the way out. Before his shocked face could settle I said: “Leave. Do not follow me anymore: I do not want this.”

Om Durga JAY. With the eternal power of the feminine within, nothing can fight you.

I did it again. In India a taxi driver picked up a friend from the streets. He hadn’t asked me if it was ok. And I smelled something strange. Feeling the thoughts of the driver, I called on Shiva and Agni. Suddenly he switched his modern tunes into: OM NAMAH SHIVAYA, the sacred prayer of Shiva. “Do you know what you are singing?” I asked. “No,” he said. The strange turned into good.

Om Durga Ma. Raise Your power in all women. This power will defeat the darkness at its source. Durga inside will frighten danger away.

So define your decisions:
Will it empower me?
Run toward your desire; run toward fear.

All life’s decisions and challenges that shake your core, I promise they will show up when you declare yourself. It’s their wake up call, like monsters sleeping in unconsciousness.

When it comes to situations that are difficult, we lose control. We are at a crossroads without knowing which direction to take. We search for peaceful decisions that will destroy false temples, for the strength to leave old loves behind because our skin feels too tight, but we fall into our victimhood not believing we can do it.

The feminine creates. She resides inside.
It starts with power.
Power for life protection. For the welfare of all beings.

We want to hook the real
when it fits like Cinderella’s shoe made for us.
The essence booms so fully to blast.
The real touches the divine.

Apply it to your choices
and decisions

My little friend Shiva said when she was 4: “You have the power of a thousand hurricanes.”

What question is inflamed? What crisis holds you back?
Ask yourself
: Will it empower me?
Then change the script and walk it through. First, in your imagination and feel where the empowered resides. What is transformed?

: When you doubt the people with whom you collaborate.
They may foster your growth.

: When you hesitate to ask for the money you deserve.
It will show up as power in your body when the right price hits value.

: When your relationship gets difficult.
It will be your chance to return to love.

You have the power to take it in.
Relieve the others. Forgive. End pain. Transform.
Be the one rising in the line of all ancestors.
Carry your power home.

What is the life theme you are holding back?
How will it empower you? Write it down.

“Hello my name is Durga. I am incredibly powerful.”

Pleasure to meet you.


Read More · November 3, 2013 · · fiercely feminine, most popular


My name is Durga.
It’s my spiritual name.
I am named after the great mother goddess of India.

The tales in India say that Durga manifested herself out of the light of the Mother of All when the Gods prayed for revelation. The Gods of the demons had enslaved all worlds and the Gods of light were powerless. They had lost their empires of light to the Demons and wandered around the Earth helpless and forgotten. The praying Gods blessed Durga’s appearance with weapons they gifted to her. Durga killed the Demon king and restored the worlds of light.

In India worshipers praise Durga for her glory. She is a warrior goddess who protects the children of the light. She is the Goddess of empowerment who transcends the loose, lost power game.

I am weaving golden files of recycled stories

I weave my own fantasies. A thread of stainless steel and transparent glass pearls are the beginning of the memories.

My version of the Durga tale:

The war went on. Nobody noticed that the Gods and world of Light were infected. Their thoughts began to cloud over and create demons themselves covered in luminous armors. Uncontrolled thoughts took on a life of their own and perpetuated the war against darkness.

Durga fought on the side of light to protect the children of light. After all, this was her promise since she was created. The war was the worst in the history of the universe but Durga was invincible in the midst of devastating attacks between light and darkness. Her style, her battlefield. But the sound of the war endured so long it seemed to be the sound of the universe. Loud and destructive. The death of endlessness would not cure the tears of the mothers.

In the worst battle of all, Durga suddenly stopped and stood still while bombs and destructive arms danced around her in an evil Tango. Still, she was not afraid of being hit. She watched the children of light and the children of dark brutally destroying the creation. She saw God in both. She shivered at what had happened to the children of the light: those she was fighting for had become the same slaughterers they feared. “This war will never end, it will destroy everything,” she said, and she walked out of battle with her weapons lowered in desperation.

Furious and full of anger Durga headed to the throne of God and banged her forehead on the crystal stairs so they splintered and instantly, perfectly reassembled themselves. (God thinks himself complete no matter what happens.)

“I know you hear me, God father. This war is eternal. We will never find a way out of fighting and killing the other side. The pain of the mothers will never be healed. The temptation to fight hatred with rage has won over creation.”

God’s throne stayed silent and calmed Durga’s answerless soul. When she looked up a beautiful man walked out of the eternal light, one she had never seen before. He was no God, no angel, no demon.

Durga fainted. This feeling was the most beautiful she had ever experienced. Blissfully inhaling pure beauty, she was healed.

“This is my son. He is my love.”

Love, uttered Durga for endless ages.

“Is this the solution out of this war, father?”


“I want you to teach me love, father.”

“Are you sure you want this?”


Durga rose.

“This is the most difficult initiation path you can walk. You will experience the worst and I will ask you again and again: Do you still love?”

“This is my path.”

Durga was sure. If there was any chance to end the war between light and darkness, she would walk the path.

Durga did it then and she still does.

She walks the path of love.

The curtain falls.
This one ends for now. As I recycle my stories the way they come to me I ask myself what I want to be today, I who am named after Durga.

I made a decision. I walk back to the battlefield. What we have once left we must take up and weave the story till it’s complete.

I draft my manifesto:

I am back.
I will neither stand for the children of light nor for the children of darkness.

I ask the children of light to remember the eternal traditions that have always nourished our souls. I have no patience.

I ask the children of darkness to end the ignorance and remember the will that carries us all in beauty. I have no time.

We know what belongs to us.
Our world needs us all.
Let us end the war.
Now or never.
Everyone is at risk.
Anything can happen to the beloved characters and to the evil ones.

(This is why we love Game of Thrones.
The good guys do not always win.)

What do we do when we face two good paths?
Will we honor keeping our world or let our inner demons win?


I carry my name with pride.
I am back on stage.
I love you.

Dear you, tell me – do you like my fantasy stories? My fantasies have many more chapters. Would you like to read more of my endless repertoires? Then I will count on your comments below to fire me up. As always I write for you because I love to, and your comments help me to come closer.

Love always



Read More · June 30, 2013 · · fiercely feminine, most popular